Konfliktstilar

Omställningsnätverket internationellt

Aktivitet

Prepared by: Root Cuthbertson 2021. Text adapted from Amanda Willcox and Stacy Muller 2018; from Katherine Pine, Bryan Hayden, and Natasha Rascon eds. 2016. Assessment adapted from Reginald Adkins 2006.

Creative Commons 4.0 BY-SA

What is your preferred conflict management style?

People typically have a preferred way of dealing with conflict based on temperament, personality, background, environment, values, beliefs, experiences, and stage of life. Psychologists have described five major styles of conflict management. None is superior to any other, and it is possible to have more than one style.

The graph (adapted from Moore, 1986) shows how higher and lower concern for self and others affects how people manage conflict, mapping five styles — Competing, Collaborating, Avoiding, Accommodating, and Compromising — against the two axes of concern for self och concern for others. The middle represents a medium concern for self and others.

Thomas and Kilmann (1974) suggest that in a conflict situation, a person's behaviour can be assessed on two factors:

1. Commitment to self, goals or assertiveness — the extent to which an individual (or a group) attempts to satisfy their own concerns or goals.
2. Commitment to others, relationships or cooperation — the extent to which an individual (or a group) attempts to satisfy the concerns of others, and the importance of the relationship with others.

Thomas och Kilmann använder dessa faktorer för att förklara fem olika sätt att hantera konflikter: Avoiding, Competing, Accommodating, Compromising, and Collaborating.

Avoiding — "Conflict? What conflict?"

Detta förhållningssätt är vanligt hos personer som har en negativ syn på konflikter. Man undviker att ta itu med konflikter eller problem och undviker att stå upp för sig själv eller andra. Den som undviker får oftast inte det han eller hon vill ha eller behöver, och andra känner likadant. I denna "förlora-förlora"-strategi tar ingen av parterna itu med det som orsakar konflikten, och båda kan känna sig otillfredsställda eller ignorerade.

Competing — "My way is the only way."

While taking a stance may be warranted, this is a win-lose approach, using whatever power is necessary to win, pursuing one party's goals at another party's expense. It may display as defending a position, interest, or value. This approach may be supported by social institutions (courts, legislatures, quotas, etc.) and can be initiated by the actions of one party. Competition may be appropriate or inappropriate (as defined by the expectations of the relationship). This style may be seen as demanding, selfish, or bullying. With this approach, the loser can feel short-changed or that their needs are being ignored.

Accommodating — "Whatever you want is okay with me."

In this lose-win approach one party ignores or overrides their own concerns to satisfy the concerns of the other party. Accommodators typically will not ask for anything in return, and can get resentful if a reciprocal relationship is not established. Once resentment grows, accommodators often shift to a competing approach because they are tired of being "used." Others may take advantage of them, and accommodators may feel they never have their own needs fulfilled.

Compromising — "Meet me in the middle."

The objective of this approach is often a quick solution that will work for both parties, resolving multiple issues in a short period of time. Usually it involves both parties giving up something and meeting in the middle. For example, a buyer and a seller may compromise to find a final price that is neither as high nor as low as either would prefer. This style can work well for people in long-term relationships who interact over time, like neighbours, family members, or members of an organisation. One party may give up what they want today — in exchange for another day. Both parties will eventually get what they want, but may have to wait until it is their turn. For example, siblings may compromise about taking turns with a new toy; neighbours may compromise about taking turns to repair fences.

Collaborating — "Let's solve this problem together!"

För att detta tillvägagångssätt ska vara effektivt krävs förtroende och riskvilja för att tillgodose alla parters intressen. Individerna kommer fram till en mängd olika lösningar som de arbetar med tillsammans, och den lösning som väljs är en som alla samtycker till. Denna "win-win"-strategi hjälper alla parter att känna att en balanserad lösning har nåtts så att alla känner sig nöjda.

Alla sätt att hantera konflikter kan vara lämpliga vid vissa tillfällen, och ingen stil är bättre än någon annan. De flesta människor har en stil som de föredrar, eftersom den känns mest bekväm, men den kan överanvändas. De flesta människor reagerar med sin föredragna stil när de är stressade. Med övning och självkännedom kan man lära sig att byta från sin föredragna stil.

I bästa fall kan människor använda olika stilar under olika omständigheter. För att hantera konflikter på bästa sätt kan man lära sig att ta hänsyn till situationen och avgöra vilket tillvägagångssätt som är lämpligast. Vissa tillvägagångssätt kan eskalera konflikten, skada relationer och minska förmågan att effektivt uppnå mål. Vissa tillvägagångssätt bygger upp förtroendet i relationerna, gör att målen uppnås och trappar ned konflikten. Alla har kapacitet att lära sig och tillämpa varje stil efter behov.

What does each approach need?

Sometimes an approach may not be helpful to the situation. Ideally you can be flexible and shift your approach according to the situation. When someone else is taking an approach that is not helpful, try to understand what needs may underlie their approach. When dealing with others who may not have developed their capacity to shift from their preferred style of conflict, try to listen well. By understanding the needs beneath the surface of the conflict, people can often work together toward a common goal. Here are a few examples:

• Avoiders may need to feel physically or emotionally safe. Try taking the time to assure them that they are going to be heard and listened to.
• Competitors may need to feel that something will be accomplished in order to meet their goals. Try saying: "We will work out a solution; it may take some time for us to get there."
• Accommodators may need to know that no matter what happens, your relationship will remain intact. Try saying: "This will not affect our relationship or how we work together."
• Compromisers may need to know that they will get something later. Try saying: "Can we go with my choice this time, and next time you can choose." (Be true to your word.)
• Collaborators may need to know what you want before they are comfortable sharing their needs. Try saying: "I need this, this, and this.... What do you need?"

Take the assessment

Then fill out the scoring and personal goals sheet below.

Conflict Management Styles Quiz

Source: Reginald (Reg) Adkins, PhD, Elemental Truths (elementaltruths.blogspot.com)

We each have our own way of dealing with conflict. The techniques we use are based on many variables such as our basic underlying temperament, our personality, our environment and where we are in our professional career. However, by and large there are five major styles of conflict management techniques in our tool box. In order to address conflict we draw from a collaborating, competing, avoiding, harmonizing or compromising style of management. None of these strategies is superior in and of itself. How effective they are depends on the context in which they are used.

Each statement below provides a strategy for dealing with a conflict. Rate each statement on a scale of 1 to 4 indicating how likely you are to use this strategy.

• 1 = Rarely
• 2 = Sometimes
• 3 = Often
• 4 = Always

Be sure to answer the questions indicating how you would behave rather than how you think you should behave.

1. I explore issues with others so as to find solutions that meet everyone's needs.
2. I try to negotiate and adopt a give-and-take approach to problem situations.
3. I try to meet the expectations of others.
4. I would argue my case and insist on the merits of my point of view.
5. When there is a disagreement, I gather as much information as I can and keep the lines of communication open.
6. When I find myself in an argument, I usually say very little and try to leave as soon as possible.
7. I try to see conflicts from both sides. What do I need? What does the other person need? What are the issues involved?
8. I prefer to compromise when solving problems and just move on.
9. I find conflicts challenging and exhilarating; I enjoy the battle of wits that usually follows.
10. Being at odds with other people makes me feel uncomfortable and anxious.
11. I try to accommodate the wishes of my friends and family.
12. I can figure out what needs to be done and I am usually right.
13. To break deadlocks, I would meet people halfway.
14. I may not get what I want but it's a small price to pay for keeping the peace.
15. I avoid hard feelings by keeping my disagreements with others to myself.

Scoring Sheet

Poängsättning av utvärderingen av konflikthanteringsstilar

As stated, the 15 statements correspond to the five conflict management styles. To find your most preferred style, total the points for each style. The style with the highest score indicates your most commonly used strategy. The one with the lowest score indicates your least preferred strategy. However, all styles have pros and cons, so it's important that you can use the most appropriate style for each conflict situation.

Min föredragna konflikthanteringsstil är:

Den konflikthanteringsstil som jag skulle vilja arbeta med är:

Hur kan jag tillämpa den här konflikthanteringsstilen?

Diskussion

For which conflict style did you get the highest score? How accurately does this reflect your preference? Did you score high on any other styles? If so, which ones? How might those styles relate to one another? Are there pieces of the descriptions of the conflict styles you disagree with? If so, why? Why might someone use a different conflict style in different environments or situations (like at work or at home)? Take a moment to think about your preferred approach to conflict. How might you adapt your approach to conflict when working with others?

Relaterade resurser

• Omformulera konflikter
• Erbjuda och ta emot feedback
• Feedbackkultur
• Medkänsla för utmanande beteende
• Empati och medkänsla
• Hur man hanterar stress i team
• Att arbeta bra tillsammans
• Sammankopplande aktiviteter för möten
• Effektiva grupper
• Building Trust
• Omedvetna fördomar
• Mainstream-Margin in Groups
• Respekt för mångfald
• Förbättra kulturell kompetens

Referenser

Adkins, Reginald (2006). "Conflict Management Styles Assessment." elementaltruths.com.

Blake, Robert and Mouton, Jane (1964). The Managerial Grid: The Key to Leadership Excellence. Houston: Gulf Publishing Co.

Burgess, Heidi (2020). "Conflict Styles."

Forsyth, Donelson R. (2009). Group Dynamics (5th ed). Boston, MA: Wadsworth.

McKee, Rachel and Carlson, Bruce (1999). The Power to Change. Grid International Inc.

Moore, Christopher W. (1986). The Mediation Process: Practical Strategies for Resolving Conflict. Jossey-Bass.

Pine, Katherine, Bryan Hayden, and Natasha Rascon editors (2016). Introduction to Public Communication, 2nd edition. Department of Communication, Indiana State University, licensed under a Creative Commons BY-SA 4.0 International License.

Rahim, M. Afzalur and Bonoma, Thomas V. (1979). "Managing Organizational Conflict: A model for diagnosis and intervention." Psychological Reports, 44: 1323-1344.

Rahim, M. Afzalur and Magner, Nace R. (1995). "Confirmatory Factor Analysis of the Styles of Handling Interpersonal Conflict: First-order factor model and its invariance across groups." Journal of Applied Psychology, 80: 122-132.

Rahim, M. Afzalur (2002). "Toward a Theory of Managing Organizational Conflict." International Journal of Conflict Management, 13(3): 206-235.

Thomas, Kenneth W. and Kilmann, Ralph H. (1974). The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument. Tuxedo, New York: Xicom.

Wagner, Joan (editor), Conflict contributions by Amanda Willcox and Stacy Muller (2018). Leadership and Influencing Change in Nursing. University of Regina Press, licensed under a CC BY 4.0 International License.

Wikipedia. "Dual Concern Model." "TKI Conflict Mode Instrument." "Managerial Grid Model."

This document, prepared by Root Cuthbertson 2021, is released under Creative Commons 4.0 BY-SA license.

For more resources like this one, go to resources.transitionnetwork.org or to the Transition Network international website www.transitionnetwork.org.